Men grieve in many ways, just like anyone else, but they often express it differently due to societal expectations, upbringing, and personal coping mechanisms. Here are some common ways men process grief:
- Stoicism & Suppression – Many men are conditioned to be “strong” and may suppress their emotions, choosing to grieve privately rather than openly expressing sadness.
- Distraction Through Activity – Instead of openly mourning, some men channel their grief into work, hobbies, or physical activities as a way to keep their minds occupied.
- Anger & Irritability – Grief can sometimes manifest as frustration, impatience, or even aggression, especially when emotions feel overwhelming but difficult to express.
- Withdrawal & Isolation – Some men prefer to grieve alone, avoiding emotional conversations or social interactions. They might not talk about their loss unless they feel completely safe to do so.
- Seeking Control – In situations of loss, some men focus on problem solving or taking care of others as a way to regain a sense of control.
- Delayed Grieving – Men sometimes postpone grieving, by either suppressing it or avoiding it until it becomes impossible to ignore, sometimes-surfacing years later.
- Silent Suffering – Instead of verbalizing grief, men may express it through subtle signs like changes in sleep patterns, appetite, or engagement in risky behaviors.
Of course, not all men grieve this way. Some are open with their emotions, seek support, or go to therapy. But, societal norms often shape how grief is expressed. The most important thing is to acknowledge and process grief in a way that leads to healing, rather than repression.
Here are a few ways to support him:
- Give him space, but do not disappear. Let him know you are there without pressuring him to open up.
- Offer practical help. Sometimes taking care of everyday tasks (meals, errands, etc.) is more helpful than deep conversations.
- Invite, but do not push. Encourage activities that might help him process grief, like exercise, hobbies, massages, a sound bath session or even just a low-pressure social outing.
- Listen without trying to “fix” things. If he does talk, resist the urge to give advice—just be present.
- Check in over time. Grief does not have a timeline, and men who suppress it might need support weeks or months later, when others have moved on.
For additional support contact:
AzalBenneLockettFoundation.org
DrPortiaLockett.com
https://www.facebook.com/portialockett/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/drportialockett/
Http://www.youtube.com/portialockett/
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